


Don't Break Me

by GuineapigQueen



Category: South Park
Genre: Factitious Disorder, Faking Illness, Gaslighting, M/M, Manipulation, Past Child Abuse, lying, munchausens, toxic relationship dynamics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-19
Updated: 2020-03-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:02:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,199
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23199841
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GuineapigQueen/pseuds/GuineapigQueen
Summary: "What are you -ngrhh- accusing me of?" Tweek growls."Literally nothing Tweek, I'm accusing you of your health improving? Isn't that good?" Craig huffs in annoyance. He's sick of his intentions being misinterpreted.
Relationships: Craig Tucker/Tweek Tweak
Comments: 11
Kudos: 41





	1. You Thought I Was Elastic

**Author's Note:**

> HI! So I want to preface this by saying that I am not trying to attack the chronic illness community. I have a chronic illness and people faking infuriates me, it's often these type of people which mean my complaints don't get taken seriously. I am just fascinated by factitious disorder and wanted to do a psychological exploration of it. I feel like this is absolutely a turn that Tweek's life could taken given that he is an abused child. And the Creek here is not a healthy or happy Creek, so I'm sorry about that but I promise my next fic will have a happier dynamic. Thanks, I hope if you choose to read this you do so with an open mind and understand that I in now way intend to disrespect people who are genuinely chronically ill.

Craig thought it would all be over when Tweek cut ties with his parents. Tweek promised it would all be over, that they were going to start anew. Turns out their new start was just Tweek taking over the family business - always being sick, never admitting it was potentially their own doing. Craig thought that after Tweek left and stopped living with his parents he’d get to be normal. For a little while they were, Tweek’s instagram filled with smiling pictures of them going out to eat, hiking, partying, all the fun stuff young couples do. But slowly it began to fade back into what it was, hospital bands, pictures of IVs, bruises, Tweek’s pale face. Whatever got the message across really. Craig learned that it hadn’t been all Tweek’s parents doing. Tweek clearly liked it a little too much too, he couldn’t live without the attention and shy away from the spotlight. It was just as addictive as the drugs his parents force fed him as a child. Even without them here to enable, the cycle wouldn’t stop. Craig doesn’t know how he can fix it. 

It really started back long before Craig ever got involved. Craig has known Tweek just about his whole life as they grew up in a small town and went to the same schools. Tweek’s parents have owned the local coffee shop since before Craig was born, priding themselves on being a local business. Tweek is their only child, and Craig suspects that’s because he was always born to be a cash cow for the business. Tweek was a cute kid, Craig’s seen baby pictures, blonde, big blue eyes, darling chubby cheeks. But that wasn’t enough, it never is. Cute kids are a dime a dozen, and they don’t stay that cute forever. Maybe the novelty of having a child wore off, or maybe they needed something to attract people to the business that badly but by elementary school Craig noticed Tweek was always sick. First it was just sickly, he looked more gaunt and unwell. Then there were doctor visits, missing school for specialist appointments, ER admissions. Before high school Tweek had a slew of diagnoses, several ports and PICC lines (varying over time) and a feeding tube. But the Facebook page that Tweek’s parents ran for him, that had thousands of followers. Maybe it started out as a way to garner more attention for the family business but it snowballed into Tweek being sick, professionally on the internet.

Craig had never suspected foul play at the time. He was a kid, why would he? He just felt sorry for his friend, who seemed so miserable all the time. He visited Tweek in hospital and would come over to his house when Tweek was unable to come and play outside with the rest of the kids. Craig’s not really sure when they fell in love with each other, it just kinda happened. By high school they were dating and Tweek’s parents  _ loved it.  _ Tweek was sick  _ and gay,  _ what a great attention grabbing combo - and he has the loving, supportive boyfriend to take pictures with. Craig first inkling if suspicion was the glee the Tweaks seemed to take in all of this, Tweek being sick, looking absolutely miserable and them being so excited to take a picture of Tweek and Craig together “being cute” for Facebook. That was Craig’s first worry, and it just seemed to build. Tweek always seemed to get sick when he was with his parents, he improved when, rarely, he was allowed to go somewhere with Craig alone. He always went so quiet and complacent when his parents were around, he hardly talked or advocated for himself when doctors asked questions. It was almost like he became a different person. Not the quirky, funny and sweet boy that Craig knew and loved. 

Craig didn’t really like being featured on the Facebook page. He found it uncomfortable, there was something really tacky about it that he just couldn’t put his finger on. He agreed to be in pictures less and less, even though Tweek’s followers were all asking about him and wanting to see their favourite couple. Hospital visits felt like photo opportunities and Craig hated that. He tried to do whatever he could to make it more about Tweek feeling supported and feeling better, not about pictures to document the incident on the internet. Tweek seemed to like this, he opened up more and followed Craig’s lead with refusing to be in pictures and posts. Tweek’s parents obviously, did not like it. That’s kind of where it all came undone. 

Craig and Tweek were properly in love now, and Craig wasn’t giving up. Tweek was invested in the relationship too, he wanted to be with Craig. Tweek’s parents were beginning to lose the power they’d held so tightly over Tweek his whole life. For this they hated Craig and desperately tried to split them up. But by this stage Tweek was nearly an adult, and through some pretty tough conversations with Craig and Craig’s family, was beginning to realise that he needed to think for himself. Craig’s not quite sure when Tweek admitted that he wasn’t really sick, maybe it was all done subtly in small instalments so that the bigger picture could be pieced together. But Tweek wanted out. He didn’t want the port or the feeding tube, he confessed quietly in the dark one night that he didn’t think he needed them. That was Tweek’s issue, he was so brainwashed that he doubted his own red flags. He  _ thought  _ that he didn’t need them, he wasn’t sure. Every time he questioned his parents he was met with gaslighting. He was made to feel so crazy that he doubted his own perceptions and observations. It terrified Craig. 

First, Tweek moved in with Craig and his family and tried to find a new doctor. They were both eighteen and had just finished school, Tweek wanted his feeding tube and port removed. They were both backed into a corner so CraIg did the craziest thing he’s ever done. He proposed. They got married in the courthouse with only Craig’s family as witnesses, in the hope that Craig could find a job with insurance to help Tweek. Tweek wasn’t likely to find work as he is, but they hoped once all the medical apparatus was removed he could begin his own life again. Craig’s parents weren’t exactly happy with the decision to rush into marriage so young but they understood why he’d done it. The Facebook page was still running, with Tweek’s parents using it as a smear campaign against Tweek. Their little medical doll had rebelled after all, Tweek eventually got it taken down, as it was his name and images being used without his permission but that didn’t stop his parents trash talking him on their own personal accounts. Tweek had to give up on contact with them after that. It became very clear that they weren’t going to be civil unless Tweek came back and continued to be their medical experiment. 

Craig found a job and began a nursing degree, he and Tweek moved out and got their own apartment. Everything was going well, things were rough, sometimes money wise, but they loved one another and got through it. Tweek eventually got his medical devices removed and started to look for a job of his own, he found one as a barista. It was low paying but Tweek wasn’t qualified to do much else. And for a minute there, they had a normal life.

Craig isn’t quite sure what went wrong. He suspects it’s because Tweek didn’t like his job and saw little prospects for himself. Feeling trapped, Tweek fell back into old patterns. He claimed he felt ill a lot and constantly called off work. Craig was sympathetic at first, Tweek had seemed like he genuinely wanted to get well. But what really kicked it all back off again was Tweek having to be hospitalised for dehydration. He’d just had a stomach bug, but had become dehydrated and needed to have some IV fluids to keep his strength up. Tweek took a selfie with the IV and posted it to his Instagram and had gotten a lot of likes and comments asking him if he was okay? Tweek liked all the fuss, and Craig should have seen it as a red flag but at the time he gave Tweek the benefit of the doubt. 

After that it just spiralled from there. Tweek claimed he had constant headaches, nausea and began to lose weight. At first Craig thought it might be psychological, in the way that sometimes anxiety makes you physically unable to eat. Tweek started googling all these specialists for diseases Craig had never heard of. Tweek also left his job, claiming whatever was ailing him made it impossible to work. Craig was suspicious but also, he wanted to believe the best in his partner, he wanted to believe Tweek was truly ill. He had been physically abused since childhood, it made sense that his body had been damaged. Craig was willing to do whatever it takes to get Tweek better.

Tweek got the port first, insisting that he had to be given medications intravenously. Tweek talked a good game when it came to medical stuff, he used lots of big words and Craig was mostly left confused and convinced. When he got further along into his nursing degree he began to understand more of Tweeks buzzwords and how empty a lot of his reasoning was. Tweek was claiming that he couldn't take medication orally because he'd just thrown it back up. That eventually led to the feeding tube being put back in, Craig didn't want to think about how much debt they were racking up. Tweek clearly wasn't thinking about it either, he was enjoying keeping his rapidly growing fanbase on instagram updated. 

Tweek promised Craig in private that the feeding tube was the key to getting well again. He promised that he was sincerely wanting to get better and that all these medical devices being reinstated was temporary. The goal was to live without them again. 

That goal was never realised. 

—

When Craig gets home after work nothing is ever done. Tweek doesn't do anything around the house, and Craig tries not to be resentful. Tweek is sick, he tells himself, this is what marriage is about. Through sickness and health, all that. At the moment Craig is studying, working and doing all the housework. It's tiring, and he struggles to find time to study but he hopes Tweek will lighten the load when he begins to feel better. 

Everytime Craig thinks that Tweek is getting better, and maybe he can hope for a normal life, Tweek takes another turn. Tweek was in the ER two days ago for heart palpitations, and here is when Craig feels guilty for sometimes doubting him, you can't fake that right? The machines he was hooked up to said his heart was playing up, that's not something Tweek can manipulate himself, surely? It's things like that that keep him questioning himself, it's almost like the boy who cried wolf. Tweek used to be a victim of parents who faked his health issues for material gain. Now he's really sick… probably? Surely? He must be. He didn't lie to Craig back when they were teenagers, why would he begin now? 

Tweek is in bed, Craig already knows without checking in on him. He's pretty sure if Tweek wasn't okay he'd know about it. Tweek isn't above calling Craig in a panic if he feels he's having some kind of medical emergency. Craig puts his bag down and gets started on making dinner. Tweek might try to eat some, but Craig doesn't count on it. Instead he makes just enough for himself, he’ll go over some revision from his textbooks while he eats and then he’ll go check on Tweek. Tweek is probably asleep in their bedroom, or he’ll be watching Netflix in the dark. He claims he’s too light sensitive and needs the lights off at all times. He’s already been diagnosed with Ehlers Dahlos Syndrome, Postural Tachycardia Syndrome and Gastroparesis. Now he claims he has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome. Craig isn’t sure how one person can have so many ailments, but he wants to believe his partner. He does think Tweek is sick, even if, in Craig’s opinion Tweek exaggerates it sometimes. 

If Tweek feels up to it he may come downstairs and beg for Craig’s attention. He claims they don’t spend enough time together but he just  _ doesn’t get it.  _ Money doesn’t grow on trees, between work, school and Tweek’s many emergencies Craig hasn’t got much in the way of spare time. He can’t just quit any of these things to lay in bed all day the way Tweek does. Somebody has to pay the bills and keep food in the cupboards. Tweek eats sometimes, but not often, he claims he can’t tolerate food bar the nutrition pushed through his feeding tube. But occasionally he’ll randomly say he feels okay enough to eat, it’s another thing that makes Craig question him. Tweek eats food that logically should upset his stomach, like ice cream or chocolate, but randomly it’s okay. That’s what makes him wonder, he feels so guilty for being suspicious but sometimes Tweek’s ailments are too convenient. He’s okay if he really wants a date night or to do something, but if they have to do something he’s not keen on suddenly he’s too sick. Craig is neglecting him because he has an assignment? Tweek suddenly needs the hospital. Craig just doesn’t know  _ how  _ he does it. 

He’s halfway through a basic pasta dish (all they can afford) when Tweek comes down the stairs. He looks rough, hair a mess, clothes disheveled, still in his pyjamas. He yawns and treads gingerly, rubbing his eyes. The plastic from his tubes and port dangling from his clothes. Craig knows he shouldn’t be doing that. He shouldn’t be so careless with them, he’s asking for an infection. Being a nursing student has its perks.

“Your tubes, Tweek” Craig reprimands.

“I know” Tweek groans “I’ll  _ -nghh-  _ fix them later, my head hurts.”

“You’ll get an infection Tweek, you can die from sepsis you know?” Craig persists. He knows he’s lecturing but ports and feeding tubes are no joke, all it takes is one infection and Tweek could end up dead. It worries Craig so much and he doesn’t understand how Tweek’s so blasé about it. 

“I do know, let me  _ -nnn-  _ wake up first” Tweek mumbles, padding into the living room.

“You take all your meds?” Craig asks, Tweek never forgets but Craig feels the need to remind him anyway. He wants Tweek to be as healthy as possible.

“Just woke up to do the  _ -ah-  _ night dose, but first,  _ -hnn-  _ cuddle me?” Tweek asks with a sweet smile. Craig finds him so hard to resist.

“Babe, I’m studying” he reminds Tweek. He wants to be able to spend more time with Tweek but if he doesn’t focus on school he’ll easily fall behind.

“Can you take a break? I’m  _ -nnn- _ lonely” Tweek pleads.

“I shouldn’t, but for you I will'' Craig concedes, he knows Tweek won’t give up when he’s like this. When Tweek is clingy and wants attention he won’t stop until he gets it. 

“I love you, you’re the  _ -gah- _ best husband ever” Tweek says, leaning over to kiss Craig’s cheek.

“I love you too, take your meds while I finish this, fix your tubes and then we can snuggle, okay?” He offers as a compromise. Sometimes Tweek just needs a little bribery.

“Okay, you take such good care of me” he says happily before heading through to the kitchen. Craig finishes his pasta while Tweek draws up his doses, he pushes them all intravenously through his port, then will set up a bag of nutrients to run through his feeding tube. It’s all so routine for them now Craig doesn’t bat an eye. What does make Craig bat an eye is when Tweek takes out his phone to snap a selfie with his tube, medicine ready to pump.

“Why do you want a picture of that?” Craig asks him.

“For  _ -nghh-  _ the insta” Tweek replies casually, like it’s nothing.

“Why do you want to share those details online?” Craig asks, he can't help but be sceptical. 

“Well it’s  _ -ah-  _ part of raising awareness” Tweek says “so many people don’t know what it’s like to  _ -hnn- _ live with a chronic illness Craig. I want to show them the reality.”

“It seems kind of weird to me” Craig replies “don’t you want to keep some stuff private? I mean you share  _ a lot.” _

“I’m  _ -gah- _ choosing to share it, so it’s empowering” Tweek replies a little defensively. 

“I guess, just don’t make yourself more sick and stressed in an effort to document your struggles” Craig is genuinely concerned about this. Stress can be a huge trigger for anybody living with a chronic illness and Craig knows Tweek is riddled with anxiety in private. He worries that there's some pressure for him to live up to being some selfless warrior on social media and that might actually encourage flare ups.

“I won’t, I have  _ -nnn-  _ you looking after me, after all” Tweek says sweetly. 

“I love you and I’ll always look out for you” Craig replies. If he points out Tweek is responsible and perfectly capable of looking after himself Tweek gets upset. Tweek likes the idea that Craig is his saviour, he thinks it’s romantic, even if Craig disagrees.

Craig knows he's going to have to abandon his study for tonight. At the end of the day what Tweek wants Tweek gets. He can catch up tomorrow. 

—

When Craig arrives home the first thing he sees is the sight of Tweek asleep on the couch. Usually Tweek sticks to their bedroom when Craig isn't home but sometimes he'll migrate to the couch. Tweek is on pretty heavy medication so he can sleep during the day or in random places much easier than Craig can. Tweek is out, he hasn't heard Craig come in, shut the door and put down his stuff. That's not abnormal if he's in a deep sleep. Craig doesn't know how he isn't bored all day. Maybe it's naive but Craig thinks he'd hate being housebound all day with little to no stimulation bar netflix and reading. Tweek claims that the noise and brightness of the outside world triggers migraines in him. Craig can't actually remember if Tweek has ever been diagnosed with migraines or not. Tweek makes a lot of claims but Craig's never seen records for much of it. Some stuff he knows, like Tweek was diagnosed with gastroparesis which lead to the feeding tube. Craig's seen Tweek's heart play up and he's sure all that has to be legit but he hasn't seen records from before he and Tweek got married. 

Craig has noticed a pattern that worries him, he's reminded of it when he notices Tweek's shirt has ridden up a little in his sleep. Despite the initial weight loss, which led to the tube, Tweek's belly now has a slight pudge to it. This happens when Tweek claims he's feeling okay enough to eat orally. He only eats small amounts in front of Craig but Craig notices things missing in the cupboards. He knows Tweek is eating more orally than he claims. Every time this gets brought up Tweek will have a flare and lose weight quickly. It frightens Craig, he's not sure if it's stress, weird timing or if Tweek is flat out faking. He's never sure enough to really bring it up. 

Tweek yawns, rolls over and begins to wake up. Craig has to smile, his husband is cute, even with all the drama that comes with him.

"Hey sleepyhead" he says to Tweek. 

"Hey" Tweek replies "I didn't  _ -hnn-  _ hear you come in."

"I didn't wanna wake you" Craig says kindly. 

"I wouldn't be mad, we don't  _ -gah-  _ spend enough time together" Tweek says. Craig loves him but he just doesn't get that if their load around the house was more balanced there probably would be more time to spend together. At this point only Craig works, so he's their only source of income. Craig studies, so that he can get a better paying job to get them more money and a better life, Craig also is the only one doing work around the house. It's okay, they're married and Tweek is sick, so Craig understands why he has to do all these things but Craig is already spread too thin. 

"It gets hard with work and study. How are you feeling today?" Craig asks.

Tweeks eyes light up.

"Awful, headaches all day and I'm  _ so  _ nauseous. I've really only been able to  _ -nghh-  _ sleep, I didn't mean to fall asleep on the couch I just  _ -ah-  _ passed out" he explains, always animated when talking about health stuff. 

"You eat anything orally?" Craig asks, he always asks in the naive hope that Tweek might be more honest. 

"You know I  _ can't  _ Craig" Tweek pushes back. 

"I just wanted to ask, I want you to get better" Craig replies, he always feels a little wounded at Tweeks defensive approach, he only asks because he cares. 

"You  _ -nghh-  _ can't force it Craig, I'm chronically ill" Tweek snips. Craig gets it, but there's shades of chronically ill, is he so wrong for wanting the healthiest version of Tweek possible. 

"I won't force you, I love you and I just want to see you feeling better and enjoying life" he tries his best to explain. All of this, everything he does, is always out of love. 

"I know you do" Tweek mumbles, voice going quieter. 

"I gotta start dinner, but we can hang out while I cook and stuff?" Craig suggests, wanting to move the conversation on anywhere else. 

"I'm not going anywhere" Tweek says. Craig isn't sure if there's regret in there or not. 

"Well, you're looking healthier at least" Craig says with a smile, giving the exposed part of Tweek's stomach a gentle poke. 

"What's that supposed to mean!?" Tweek darkens immediately. He sits straight up and glares.

"That… you're looking less gaunt?" Craig frowns, he doesn't think he's done anything wrong. Sometimes they're a bit cheeky with each other, that's usually never been a cause for controversy before. 

"Are you saying I'm  _ -gah- _ fat?" Tweek hisses. Craig is confused, he's always though that it was abundantly clear that he's never thought of Tweek as fat. He's always thought Tweek was too thin. He's always happy when Tweek gains weight, it means that Tweek is closer to health.

"No? I mean, you  _ have  _ put on weight but you're not fat. You've never been fat…" he says, befuddled at Tweeks extreme reaction. 

"I'm literally being  _ -nghh- _ fed by a  _ -gah- _ tube, I'm in  _ starvation  _ mode!" Tweek exclaims angrily. Craig has to stop himself from rolling his eyes. 

"C'mon, if we're being honest, you've been eating a bit orally" Craig challenges him. They both know the truth here, getting it out in the open is another thing. 

"What are you  _ -ngrhh-  _ accusing me of?" Tweek growls.

"Literally nothing Tweek, I'm accusing you of your health improving? Isn't that good?" Craig huffs in annoyance. He's sick of his intentions being misinterpreted. 

"Just because I've gained some  _ -gah-  _ weight back doesn't mean I'm cured. My body is haywire right now, the last thing I need is my  _ -nnn-  _ husband calling me fat" Tweek spits.

"Jesus Tweek, I have never called you fat. You've never been fat! I'm calling you normal! You look healthier, not like you're dying and it's  _ great"  _ Craig can't help but bite back. He's never, ever once called Tweek fat. Tweek gets so stupidly defensive over nothing. 

"I don't feel well, I have to sit  _ -hnn-  _ down… my chest hurts," Tweek says suddenly, his demeanor going from angry to worried almost instantly. 

"Well, you just wore yourself out yelling at me for no reason" Craig replies snarkily. 

"Craig, I feel so  _ -nnn-  _ dizzy, please just stop" Tweek cries. Craig forgets how mad he is when he hears his husband talking like that. 

"Do you want your heart rate monitor?" He asks, voice much softer and kinder.

"Yes, hurry it's hard to  _ -ah- _ breathe" Tweek gasps.

Tweek's heart rate monitor does show that his heart is beating fast. Craig knows he has cardiac damage from his past abuse and anything with the heart is no joke. Craig doesn't like to play around. So they go to the ER.

Craig spends his night emailing his professors asking for assessment extensions, whilst sitting up with Tweek. Their fight is all but forgotten. 

—

The first time Craig finds a name for it is in one of his tutorials at school. It's only a footnote in his psych course but it sticks with him profoundly. A fellow student asks how to spot Munchausen by proxy and they launch into discussion. 

Craig warily puts his hand up and asks "Can someone who was a victim of by proxy as a child… can they do it to themselves as an adult?"

"That's a great question, do you mean that they develop Munchausen syndrome separately as an adult, after breaking away from parental influence?" His tutor replies, Craig is happy to clarify. 

"Yes, there's…. Someone in my life. They we're definitely being made sick by their parents as a kid. But like, can the pattern begin again as an adult? The person I'm talking about has no contact with their parents anymore" Craig doesn't want to admit that it's his husband. His classmates know him as happily married and there's something shameful about admitting you've potentially been lied to. They aren't just dating or living together, they're married. If things go tits up there has to be a whole divorce and an admission of failure on Craig's part. Craig isn't ready to be admitting to any of that. 

"It absolutely can, the parents have placed a value on attention above all else and this is ingrained in the child's psyche" his tutor explains "maybe the child hasn't got the skills to cope with adulthood, so they fall back into old patterns."

Craig falls silent after that. Everything in his brain is beginning to slot together but he doesn't want to voice it out loud yet. If Tweek has fallen back into old patterns maybe he can still help him. Is there a rehab for stuff like this? If Tweek is willing to learn new coping skills and admit fault Craig is willing to forgive him. They could do couples therapy or something… his marriage doesn't  _ have  _ to be over. 

It's not just admitting that his young, rushed marriage wasn't the best idea. Everyone around them is aware of this (well, maybe not Tweek. Tweek likes to think they're some kind of fairytale romance). Craig  _ loves  _ Tweek, properly. He doesn't want to see their relationship break down over this. He feels a little stupid for trusting Tweek so blindly, he feels very hurt because he's been lied to but overall he doesn't want to end it. Not yet, not without trying. 

The first thing he googles (as soon as he knows he's alone and that Tweek is asleep) when home is  _ "how to help someone with munchausen syndrome?"  _

Craig wants Tweek well again so they can get back to how they were. Not a messy divorce. 

—


	2. But Maybe I'm Just Made of Glass

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tweek comes, but he claims that he's frail. So Tweek insists on wearing a mask, his tubes and line visible and having a staff member help push him in his wheelchair. The university seems to want to have a reputation of being accessible so thankfully they accommodate Tweek. Craig wishes Tweek would leave some of the accessories at home (or at least tuck in his tube lines, etc) but Craig doesn't want to sour the day with arguments.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again, just going to reiterate that I mean no offence to anyone who is genuinely chronically ill. I'm just interested in the MBI phenomenon and how spouses could let the behaviour go on for so long.

Graduation is one of Craig's proudest moments. He's proud that he got his degree all while working and supporting Tweek. It's a huge achievement and it means that he can begin to improve their lives. Tweek seems to be genuinely proud of Craig's achievements too, and is happy to attend Craig's graduation with him. Tweek will sometimes flake out on events he doesn't want to attend or isn't interested in but he shows no signs of disinterest here. Craig is glad, as his parents won't be able to attend. They're very proud of him and want him to send them all the pictures, but the travel just isn't feasible for them. So Tweek will be Craig's only family attending, and Tweek seems to realise the importance there. 

Tweek comes, but he claims that he's frail. So Tweek insists on wearing a mask, his tubes and line visible and having a staff member help push him in his wheelchair. The university seems to want to have a reputation of being accessible so thankfully they accommodate Tweek. Craig wishes Tweek would leave some of the accessories at home (or at least tuck in his tube lines, etc) but Craig doesn't want to sour the day with arguments. Craig does believe that Tweek is kind of sick, but he doesn't believe that Tweek needs all the devices. He thinks the devices are a crutch, and he's working on trying to get Tweek into therapy but he wants that all put to rest today. He just wants to graduate, knowing his husband is supporting him. 

He mostly gets this, but only because he's so willing to let things slide for the sake of his sanity. Everyone stares at Tweek, and Craig is pretty sure that's exactly what Tweek wants. Tweek is lucky that Craig isn't really the desperate for attention type, and he doesn't  _ really  _ care about attention being on him or it being  _ his  _ day. But he doesn't really care for all the people gawking at them, he'd rather just blend in to the cap and gown crowd. 

A classmate of Craig's volunteers to take photos of them, which Craig appreciates as he has nobody else there as his guest. Craig doesn't mind a bit of PDA but this situation feels like it should be professional so Craig doesn't pose for any pictures with them kissing. He is okay with them having their arms around one another or holding hands. The photos are sweet, even if Tweek's medical devices are a little jarring. Tweek makes him take a selfie kissing later though, and Craig knows it'll end up on Instagram even though Craig expressed that he didn't want that. Tweek has followers he likes showing off their relationship to, Craig would rather stuff be private, but barely anything about Tweek is private so Craig just used to it. Tweek posts the picture with a long rambling caption about how proud he is of his "smart sexy husband" for "finishing school while caring for me, providing for us and never running away when I'm sick." How it's "not easy to love someone like me but he's been there through every hospital stay and held my hand fearlessly." The passage sort of devolves into how much Craig looks after Tweek while he's ill but Craig gets the sentiment. 

"Thanks babe" he tells Tweek after reading the passage, he gives Tweek a chaste kiss. There's really nothing that can ruin the night by this point. Even Tweek having an emergency, it doesn't matter if they finish the night in the ER. He did it. He graduated. He's finally a nurse! 

"I love you" Tweek tells him "but don't  _ -hnn-  _ forget you're  _ my  _ nurse."

"I'm your  _ husband"  _ Craig corrects "that's better."

"True" Tweek agrees " _ my  _ husband and  _ mine  _ only. You can be  _ -ah- _ anyone's nurse."

"Definitely, you get all the fun stuff" Craig grins, pulling Tweek a little closer.

"Well, I hope you know I don't want anyone else. That's why I'm  _ -nghh- _ showing you off tonight, I want everybody to know that you're  _ -gah-  _ mine" Tweek whispers into Craig's ear.

"I know babe, I'm just so happy you came to support me" Craig hums in reply, kissing Tweek's cheek.

"Listen, nothing would stop me, not even a flare up" Tweek promises.

"I'd forgive you if you had a flare up" Craig replies. He's not sure if he'd feel resentful or not, he probably would but there's no point bringing it up now. 

"This is a huge  _ -nghh-  _ milestone, we're married, you have your  _ -ah-  _ degree… maybe when you're settled into your career we can think about kids?" Tweek suggests, Craig thinks this is Tweek trying to reward him but it doesn't sit quite right. 

"You want kids?" Craig asks. Tweek's never really expressed any interest in parenting. He's really only invested in being sick. It hasn't escaped Craig how ineffective of a parent Tweek would be.

"I want them because you do" Tweek hums happily. Tweek knows Craig wants kids. He's wanted them since they were teenagers. Always in the future of course, Craig has sort of let go of that dream at the moment. He needs to focus on his new career, work on his relationship with Tweek, save money and maybe in the future they can revisit the conversation. 

"I dunno Tweek, we've still got tons of time to think about that" Craig replies, hoping to put this to rest for now. It's not that chronically ill people can't be good parents. Craig is sure there are many wonderful chronically ill parents but he doesn't think Tweek would be one of them. How are you supposed to address that? "Of course I want kids with you honey, but not until we both get extensive therapy" Craig knows that would go down like a lead balloon. Tweek associates any admission of his symptoms being psychological as an admission of failure. Tweek wouldn't be a good parent because he's just too focused on himself. Tweek can't bear anyone else getting attention, and is too obsessed with being sick. Tweek couldn't handle a baby in a million years. Not to mention that finding a surrogate, the IVF and the medical bills all add up and they're already in so much medical debt. Craig can't see any of this improving any time soon. 

"Definitely, what I mean is, I'm glad we can go through all these  _ -nnn-  _ milestones together. I've just been so  _ -ah- _ lucky to have found my person so young" Tweek replies, Craig likes this explanation better. 

"I love you babe, we've got forever" he assures Tweek. 

"I love you too, tonight we can do  _ -hnn-  _ whatever you want? You wanna go out with your friends? You wanna eat out? Go home and have sex til sunrise? Whatever, we're doing it" Tweek tells him playfully. Craig's a little surprised, they don't do things he wants very often and they definitely don't have sex that often. Between Tweek being too sick and Craig being too busy both their sexual and social lives have been stunted. 

"We could have a few drinks, then head home?" Craig suggests. He wants to celebrate with his classmates but also, they have sex  _ so  _ rarely. 

"Sounds perfect, I never met any of your  _ -ah-  _ classmates anyway" Tweek grins, he takes Craig's hand "lead the way, nurse."

A group of Craig's fellow classmates that Craig has shared tutorials with have organized drinks at a local bar. Some other people have brought their significant others, a couple are also married but the married couples are in the minority. Craig isn't surprised, if he'd had a bit more of a choice in the situation he probably would've married Tweek later too but things played out differently. He was the youngest, and first to marry out of his peers he remembers everyone being shocked that he was 18 and married during orientations. 

Naturally Tweek is the dominant topic of conversation. Craig has left most of Tweek's medical debacles out of conversation with his classmates deliberately. It's the only escape he gets from it, he didn't think of how things would go when the two worlds collide. He realises now he probably shouldn't have tried to have his cake and eat it too. They should've just gone straight home.

"Craig is  _ amazing"  _ Tweek drawls, "he's looks after me this whole  _ -nghh- _ time. I can't work, so he's the reason that I have a home"

"Can I ask what you've been diagnosed with?" A classmate, Adam, asks.

"Of course!" Tweek grins, always happy to oblige "I had my first feeding tube as a  _ -gah-  _ child. I've basically always had gastroparesis. Later they realised that this was probably  _ -nnn-  _ because I have EDS. Sorry, ehlers-danlos syndrome… you're nurses, you guys  _ -ah- _ know. And I started having cardiac problems as a teenager, I have a diagnosis of POTS, but other issues are suspected but I haven't found my diagnosis yet" he explains. 

"Sorry" he says, "just one sec. I have to take my  _ -hnn- _ meds"

"No problem" his nurse friends all reply. They're  _ professionals  _ now, afterall. 

Craig just about wants to die as Tweek draws up, then pushes two of his IV meds right there at the table. Normally Craig wouldn't be ashamed, it's just that he knows Tweek loves this so much. Tweek is smugly grinning as everyone in the bar gawks. Craig wants the floor to swallow him. 

"Wow, isn't EDS rare?" Another classmate, Mia, asks. Bringing the conversation back to Tweeks health. 

"EDS is rare,  _ everything  _ Tweek has is rare" Craig replies, trying his best to sound sincere. 

"I'm a zebra, but I'm  _ your  _ zebra, aren't I Craig?" Tweek says sweetly, taking Craig's hand under the table.

"Of course" Craig replies. 

"It must be so hard on you, not being able to work?" She continues. 

"It's  _ awful,  _ I wish I could do  _ -nghh- _ more for us. Craig does everything he's actually a saint" Tweek fawns, Craig hates when he does this. 

"I'm not-"

"You absolutely are baby, I would not be  _ -nnn-  _ here without you" Tweek says. Craig feels like an asshole if he objects or asks Tweek to stop. 

"Aw, you guys are so cute together. Craig, why did you hide him from us for so long?" Another classmate, Maisy, adds on.

"I've just been too sick, but obviously tonight is  _ -nghh- _ special. I had to be there for my man, no matter what" Tweek says, probably trying to sound brave. 

"That's so nice of you!" Mia squeals. Tweek makes them appear so perfect in front of others, but they really  _ really  _ aren't. 

Craig honestly can't get home fast enough, just to get away from the conversation. Luckily for him, something about him having a degree seems to make him more attractive to Tweek. Tweek thoroughly embarrasses him in the uber by being unable to keep his hands off him. But at least they get to be intimate again, once home, finally. 

—

Craig thought actually working as a nurse would be a turning point for him and Tweek. He thought things would improve, maybe Tweek would improve but instead everything went to shit.

Craig loves being a nurse, the job, while difficult, is everything he wanted it to be. He has no qualms taking extra shifts and learning as much as he can. He finds that he is a good nurse, and he finds a fulfillment in his career that he had lacked before. 

It takes him away from Tweek. And Tweek hates it. At first, when Tweek has medical emergencies Craig calls in. He rushes home to support Tweek. But Craig begins to realise that Tweek has these emergencies whenever he feels Craig is neglecting him. Tweek brings up Craig doing less hours, maybe even quitting, so that they can spend more time together (so that Craig can become his carer, really.) Craig won't buy that, he starts giving in less and less. Leaving Tweek to post his sad ER stories on his Instagram alone. He will pop down to the ER in his break, but if he doesn't drop everything running that's not enough for Tweek. 

Tweek gets upset with him. He cries, screams, gaslights and argues. Craig, already tired from work, is passive. Tweek eventually says "it's your career or me!" 

And Craig calls his bluff. 

It's the hardest thing he's ever done, but he leaves. Nursing is the only thing giving him any kind of fulfillment and happiness. Craig begins to think maybe he and Tweek's marriage has been over for a while now but Craig wasn't ready to face it. 

When Tweek begs Craig to come back Craig offers his own ultimatum. For Tweek to admit he's not really sick and to see a therapist. Tweek refuses and Craig knows it's really over. Craig takes his shit and crashes on a colleagues couch, feeling like the worst scum of the earth. 

He's the asshole who left his sick husband after all. At least, that's what Tweek portrays to social media, and just about anyone who will listen. 

But when push comes to shove, Craig can't give up nursing. Turns out, he can give up Tweek. Or this new Tweek at least, this Tweek is not the old Tweek Craig married. It's all been lost.

—

Craig doesn't mind doing the night shift. Truthfully, it helps him forget how single he is now. He and Tweek haven't officially divorced but they've been separated for two years now. Craig hasn't seen him in over a year and the only contact they've had is his friends sending him screenshots of the shit Tweek posts about him on his social media. Craig has always done the grown thing and ignored it, he tries not to bad mouth Tweek and has really only told his mom the full story of their breakup. 

He still feels really awful about the whole situation. He hadn't wanted it to come to this, he wanted to work things out and still be married. He hates that he'll probably be divorced before he's thirty. Maybe getting married so young was a mistake but Craig loved Tweek. He still loves Tweek, even if Tweek is a shell of who he once was now. Craig  _ wanted  _ them to be forever, but he can't just keep giving and giving while Tweek offers nothing. Even Craig has limits. 

So he becomes married to his career instead and Tweek seems to have married being sick on Instagram. It's the last outcome he wanted, but he has to face defeat. He thinks he is happier now. 

The people who are close to Craig know the real story. That he was trapped in a relationship and guilted into staying. That Tweek used his health as threats and leverage. That he's definitely not the asshole who left his sick partner like Tweek tries to portray. Craig is just grateful that his work friends and his family all believe him and his suspicions that Tweek is inducing his illness. 

His colleagues often ask him how he avoids Tweek, who frequents hospitals so often. Craig hasn't had to, he's been lucky. Tweek found a new doctor and a different hospital after their split. Tweek only comes here if he's been turned away everywhere else and he seems to never be admitted. So Craig hasn't had any unwanted run ins. He figures one is probably coming, since Tweek doctor and hospital hops when he feels he isn't getting what he wants. Or if a doctor is on to him. 

He just didn't expect the run in to be today. He walks onto the ward after scrubbing up and getting sterile expecting anything but what he finds. The nurse updating him clearly doesn't realise that Craig knows Tweek in any way. She just explains that he has sepsis and it's very serious. She doesn't even realise that they share a last name, but Craig doesn't blame her. He doesn't always pay attention to details like that when he's looking after someone who is that ill. 

He balks when he sees Tweek lying on the bed. He looks deathly thin, skin bruised from IVs, pale and almost dead looking in the face. But it's Tweek, Craig would know him anywhere. Craig doesn't say it out loud though, at the end of the day Tweek is a patient that needs help, nobody deserves to die, self induced or not. 

Craig has to question himself though. Tweek never did anything like this to himself when they were together. He's never given himself sepsis. Sepsis is no joke, and Craig can't see a universe where Tweek would do it on purpose. Tweek didn't even do that as a ploy to get him back when he was leaving. He has to wonder if maybe he was wrong, was Tweek telling the truth all along? Did he let paranoia and suspicion get the best of him? He can't ponder for too long because work has begun and Tweek needs help. So he begins his shift.

Craig doesn't have to worry about Tweek making a scene when he arrives. Tweek is far too sick to be with it enough to know. He can't talk, he just moans sometimes and is barely conscious at all. Craig dutifully checks on him each round, as he would any other patient and hopes for improvement. 

Only one other nurse notices they have the same last name.

"Yeah" Craig comes clean "that's my ex husband."

"The faker? He gave himself sepsis?" She asks, shocked.

"I don't know, he wouldn't, would he?" Craig wonders. He doesn't think he can believe Tweek would actively choose to induce sepsis. 

"It's not unheard of, but you probably shouldn't be treating him right?" She points out.

"We haven't really got the resources for that, I'll treat him just like any other patient. No use accusing him of faking, he can't string a sentence together" Craig replies. If they had more nurses maybe he'd ask to be assigned somewhere else, but he knows that probably won't go over well.

"Well, you just say if you can't anymore" she encourages. He agrees, but he can't really be upset at Tweek at a time like this. He's just numb, and so shocked that this is the state Tweek deteriorates to after two years apart. He feels so guilty. 

Craig is relieved when Tweek does start to improve, even if it means facing him. He decides to stay with Tweek after his shift even if his instincts tell him better. He spent so long detangling himself just to be pulled straight back in again. 

"I know it's you Craig" Tweek croaks from his bed.

"Yeah, I've been worried" Craig replies, unsure what he should say.

"Don't you hate me?" Tweek asks, voice hoarse and pitiful "is this like,  _ -nghh-  _ revenge for you?"

"No, I'm happy you're getting better. You scared the shit out of me when you were first brought in" Craig says honestly. He could never, ever take pleasure in a patient being so gravely ill. Especially not one who is his ex husband. 

"I thought I was dying" Tweek admits, voice shaky. He sounds genuinely frightened. 

"You were, I'm so glad you've improved" Craig tells him, he doesn't bother to hide his emotions. Ex or not, Craig loves him and the idea of Tweek dying upsets him deep inside. 

"I'm sorry" Tweek says, voice wobbling and eyes tearing. 

"Why?" Craig asks, Tweek doesn't owe him anything anymore. They've been separated for two years now.

"For driving you away. I didn't want to end up alone, and I definitely didn't want  _ -hnn-  _ sepsis" Tweek admits. It's sad and pathetic, seeing him reduced to a bed like this. Sick and weak for real, there are no winners here.

"Do you know how you got it?" Craig asks him, hoping Tweek will be truthful. 

"My line got infected" Tweek's voice goes even quieter "look, I know in the past I've kinda… exaggerated but… I didn't do this to myself" he sounds so genuine that Craig believes him. Since they got married Tweek has never wanted to admit that he might be slightly exaggerating or faking. This admission is a breakthrough. 

"I… all I've ever really wanted was for you to admit it" Craig honestly says. 

"I don't want to die Craig, I'll admit it" Tweek repeats, more firmly this time. 

"You need serious help Tweek" Craig tells him, there's no point in dancing around it. 

"I know. Losing you was the worst thing that  _ -ah-  _ ever happened to me" Tweek says, sounding genuinely miserable. 

"I didn't want to leave, I left because you didn't want to go to therapy and work on our relationship. We were stuck in the same unhappy cycle" Craig does his best to explain. He wants Tweek to know it was the faking, not the prospect of being married to someone chronically ill that drove him away. 

"I want to now, I want to get better," Tweek pleads.

"I've missed you so much" Craig admits. There's never really been anyone else, and Craig hates that. 

"Me too, I just… what can I do to get us  _ -ah-  _ back again" Tweek says sadly.

"I don't know, but if you're willing to work on it, maybe I am too…" Craig admits. 

Maybe this is the breakthrough Craig has been wishing for. 

—

Craig knows it's probably stupid, but much like their marriage, Craig jumped all in reconciling with Tweek. They moved back in together straight away and began carrying on where they left off straight away. Craig is glad they never actually got divorced, Tweek often talks about how their love had to endure challenges so that they could know they belonged together. 

To be honest, the sepsis seems to have scared Tweek straight. Tweek had all his medical devices removed during the sepsis scare to prevent further infection so he's currently tube, port and PICC line free. 

"It's nice not having them" he tells Craig "I've never been so healthy."

Craig doesn't believe Tweek faked, or intentionally induced sepsis. He finds himself questioning all of Tweek's past behavior. Maybe he got paranoid and drank the kool aid, getting caught up with conspiracies because they were both unhappy in the relationship. He's not sure, some days he's positive Tweek has always been deathly ill and others he's more critical and suspicious. But Tweek has stopped the over the top behavior for now. His Instagram is filled with inspirational quotes and wellness advice. He posts a lot of photos of his feeding tube scars with hashtags like #recovery and #invisibleillness. Craig prefers this take it a day at a time approach, it's a much more constructive and positive way of living with chronic illness. Tweek hasn't gone back to work, but he does make some money from his social media. It's not much, but Craig supposes it's something. Tweek also eats orally and gets out to exercise, which is leaps and bounds. He still has heart problems, but they're nowhere near like they were when Craig and Tweek split up. He's not off all medications, he has heart meds and some meds he takes to help digestion. Craig is just happy he's not parading himself around on social media like a medical doll or something. It's much healthier to have hobbies, interests or social interactions beyond being unhealthy. Chronic illness was ruling his life and identity. He seems to be more like that old Tweek Craig had been longing for. It gives him hope that that Tweek might come back. 

It's like they're having their honeymoon phase a second time. Even though they've been married since they were eighteen (and only split up for two years, they've been together for the majority of each others lives) this reinvigoration of their relationship feels new and fun. Lighthearted and hopeful. Craig is just so happy Tweek is taking care of himself finally. It's really been all Craig's ever wanted throughout their marriage. 

Craig knows Tweek is the one for him and they just have to ride out the highs and lows. Through sickness and health, even if Tweek's illness is more mental than physical. 

—

All honeymoon periods end. Craig had so much naivety and hope for their marriage when they first got back together. They got maybe a year or so of Tweek being normal. The way Craig sees it, Tweek being well and his wellness based social media just didn't get the likes and engagement that his sick content did. Tweek never went back to work, he claimed he was in too much pain from his EDS. Tweek has been diagnosed with this condition since adolescence but Craig doesn't believe he actually has it.

Craig's trust has been shattered again and again over time. Tweek promised he'd actually try to get healthy, then when attention and likes dwindled he fell back on to fake flare ups. He ended up having both his port and feeding tube reinstalled, Tweek was so deathly thin at the time that Craig couldn't really refuse. Even if the illness was self induced and psychological, Tweek wasn't eating and he needed the nutrients one way or another. Craig doesn't want his husband to die. 

Craig no longer doubts his suspicions though. He knows Tweek is self inducing episodes or infections. He's a nurse, he deals with ill people every day. He also knows how to spot fakers, and he sees the patterns at home. Tweek is actually red flagged at the hospital Craig works at and Tweek needs to ER hop because of it. It's so embarrassing for Craig but he just tells his colleagues that he can't force Tweek to change, Tweek has to want that himself.

They ask him "why don't you leave?"

And Craig has to answer that he thinks Tweek will die if he does.

Craig realises the sepsis Tweek had originally may have just been a ploy to get him back. Tweek may have been trying to get himself admitted to cross Craig's path but ended up going too far and giving himself life threatening sepsis. The ploy worked though. Every time Craig has tried to call him out or leave again, Tweek gives himself an infection. Craig knows it's a warning. One day Tweek  _ will  _ die, and that will be on him, the husband who left him to kill himself. 

Craig isn't happy. He hasn't been happy for years, but he's pretty equally miserable without Tweek too. Their good moments, while fleeting, are amazing. Craig realises that he lives for those, because day to day he's unhappy. But he knows what the consequences will be if he leaves again. 

It's just what his life has become now. He's completely trapped, while his colleagues tell him that he can leave. He left once, he can do it again. They don't realise how bad things really are. Before their split Tweek would ever have given himself sepsis, the stakes are higher and Tweek is bolder. Less afraid to let Craig know why he has to stay. Craig can only hope things change. He knows they can only go two ways. Tweek admits he needs help and goes down that route, although he has permanently damaged his heart from his self induced episodes and he'll have to live with that forever. Or he will die at his own hand, maybe he'll induce sepsis, something will go wrong with his feeding tube or maybe his port will cause an infection in his already weak heart. On Craig's worst days, he secretly wishes for the latter. 

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is blesspastacraig if you wanna be friends :)


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